Fog-Free Writing

by Don McClaire

Did a publisher or agent reject your manuscript?  

Foggy writing--that is, using extra, misused and overused words--may well be the reason. The fact is, the more words you eliminate without changing meaning or sacrificing detail, the clearer and more powerful your writing becomes.  

And the better chance you have of being published!

Are YOU a foggy writer?  Probably.  I’ve been a professional editor and writer for 40 years, and learned early that most writers--particularly unpublished ones--need heavy editing. Unfortunately, most don’t know they're foggy writers.  They know they should self-edit, but how?  Exactly which words should they take out?  Why? Most unpublished writers toil their whole lives without getting "the call" from a publisher, and often, foggy writing is the reason.

But again, most unpublished writers don't know that.  They haven't a clue!  Although I enjoy the editing process, back then I secretly wished I could teach the writers I was responsible for to defog their own work.  That, of course, seemed impossible. 

But wait.  I was wrong! That was before I discovered the 21 Steps to Fog-Free Writing. These Steps changed my own writing life forever, and I'm betting they will change yours.

That personal revelation took place several years ago on a flight from Chicago to Atlanta, where I was to research an article for a client.  Out of boredom I was penning improvements in a fog-filled paperback—editing is actually a game for me— when I realized the same mistakes appeared over and over.  I was intrigued.  I bought another paperback at the Atlanta airport and edited it.  A pattern emerged.  I could hardly contain my excitement. 

Over the next several months I edited many other paperback novels.  I joined critique groups and aggressively edited other writers’ fiction.  I plowed through all those manuscripts from pre-published authors and the marked-up paperback books I'd tossed into a dresser drawer, and painstakingly sorted thousands of offending sentences by problem type.  I eventually identified 21 distinct fog problems.  Today I call their solutions, appropriately enough, the “21 Steps to Fog-Free Writing.” 

The inference staggered me.  Just as there are only so many elements in chemistry’s Periodic Table, and so many letters in the alphabet, there are only so many fog problems in writing. Again, I counted 21.  I realized many unnecessary words were actually tips of bad-writing icebergs, and that eliminating them, or replacing them with fewer words, quickly resolved otherwise complicated editing problems.  In fact, more than half the Steps actually strengthened action while shortening sentences. You could see it happening right before your eyes! 

Here’s the good news.  You don’t have to be an English major to achieve this writing miracle.  You don’t have to diagram sentences or study verb declensions, whatever they are.  You don’t have to learn complicated rules, or wade through thick manuals of style.  All you have to do is apply a few easy-to-learn Steps.  Soon you’ll write sparkling, clear, powerful copy that attracts readers, agents, and editors.  And sales!

Send me your manuscript’s first chapter, and I'll prove it. I’ll edit and critique it, and tell you exactly why I suggest changes.  I’ll give you solid examples.  Believing in the “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” adage, I’ll present only those Steps you need. The idea, after all, is to simplify things.

You’ll pick up the Steps easily as you incorporate them into that first chapter.  Then, as you apply them to the rest of your manuscript, you’ll recognize and chase away every “fog” word.  Your manuscript will sparkle.  There’s no way it won’t!  And every manuscript you write from now on will be clearer than you’ve ever written, for two reasons: You won’t write most of those foggy words in the first place, and you’ll know exactly what to look for when you self-edit.

So consider this your fog alert.  Remember this old story?  “Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day, but teach him to fish and he’ll eat for a lifetime.”  Send me that first chapter today, and I'll teach you to fish!

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Read Article by Louise Behiel "Writing Workshops: 21 Steps to Fog Free Writing"